How Not to Ruin Your Relationships When You’re In a Rotten Mood

You know that yucky feeling when you can’t
even look at yourself in the mirror, when you
want to turn your phone on silent, pull the
covers over your head and hide from the
world.
You can do that if you live by yourself, never
leave your house, and live in the remote
mountains of Mt. Kilimanjaro. But if you’re
like the rest of us and have a job, go to the
grocery and stop at Starbucks every morning,
you have to face people every day- no matter
what mood you’re in.

Bad moods are a part of life. They come on
fast and hard. They happen without warning.
Everything is fine and then BAM! Before you
know it, you’re yelling at your cat for walking
between your legs, you’re eating a pint of ice
cream, or your thoughts are dark and your
words disappear. Unfortunately, rotten moods
are a reality you must learn to live with.

During that time, here are 12 tips to help you
cope with your gloomy thoughts and not hurt
people you love, live with or work with.

1. Admit to yourself that you’re in a bad
mood.
Deceiving yourself by going into denial will
only prolong and deepen the darkness. Identify
your crankiness, even if you can’t find the
source of it. Waking up after a restless
nightmare-filled night makes you snap at
everyone who comes near you. Be gentle with
yourself, especially when you feel out of sync.

2. Ask for a time-out.
Be considerate of the people in your orbit. Tell
them you need some time alone. You may not
know what’s going on but you know it’s best
to be alone for an hour. Remove yourself to
either a bathroom, a car, the local deli, or
Starbucks. Go for a walk, get some fresh air.
Breathe and give yourself time to reframe your
negative thinking or physical discomfort.

3. Cry like a baby.
Crying is cleansing. Listen to a sad song or
turn on The Notebook, bring those tears out
from your soul. Let it all out. Yes, guys can
cry too.

4. Tell someone else.
Be honest it might make you feel better. If you
can, tell whomever you come in contact with
so they don’t think you’re mad at them. Share
your worries with someone you trust. Someone
who won’t judge you, but will stand beside
you with a shoulder to lean on.

5. Beware of your stress levels.
if you have an appointment, get ready 30
minutes earlier, text them and tell them you’ll
be a little late. Don’t make it worse, by adding
more stress to your already stressed-out state
of mind.

6. Have a sense of humor.
LOL. Laugh if you can. Try to joke about how
crummy you feel. Just be sure to make fun of
yourself (not anyone else).

7. Silence is a good thing.
Pause before you speak. When your thoughts
in a negative space, your words often match.
You end up saying things you soon regret.
During your darkness, it is especially
important to watch your words.

8. Break the silence.
After you’ve had a good cry, gone out for a
walk, and had a chance to reframe your mood,
share your thoughts with someone who loves
you. If no one understands, hire a therapist
who will listen and help you through your
abyss.

9. Realize you don’t live in a bubble.
Bad moods make us self-absorbed. No one
else exists but you. Everything is about you.
Give yourself a gentle slap and realize that
people who love you are close to you. They
don’t know how to handle you. They don’t
know what to say. You may not be able to
communicate what you feel, but just look at
them and see how much they love you.

10. Understand yourself.
Take a personal inventory. Don’t get lost in
over-analyzing yourself but just take a step
back (if you can) and think about what is
upsetting you? Are your feelings hurt from
something your boss said? Are you holding in
anger? Is there a decision you need to make
but don’t want to make? Give yourself time to
process what you feel. Think lovingly of
yourself. Be your own best friend.

11. Look for the message.
After the darkness clears and the sun comes
out, see if there is a lesson to be learned.
Often in your hardest moments, the greatest
wisdom comes to you. Maybe not
immediately, but soon after. Keep your mind
open to the possiblity that your bad mood
might be filled with wisdom you need to have
about yourself.

12. Write it, if you cannot speak about it.
The words in your head are often hard to
verbally process. Writing is an excellent
method of communicating the thoughts you
cannot speak. Write about what you feel.
Writing is private. Writing is an expression of
your soul.

Being in a bad mood is certainly unpleasant
but it doesn’t have to become a monstrous
event that destroys your relationships, or gets
you fired. Yes, it can have a huge affect on
your day but it happens to everyone. We all
know life can be tough but the good thing is
that we all know it. It’s what bonds us
together.

Everyone will understand; if you are true to
yourself, your feelings and the people around
you.

It’s okay if you need a little time to be alone
and cry but when you’re finished, share your
feelings with that one special someone who
will love you, wait for you, and be there for
you in your darkest hour, no matter what.

We’ve all been there before. Remember…
you’re never alone. Somebody loves you.